Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize