i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
