she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
