did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize