I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Randomize
