That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
