He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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