Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize