dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fucked my hip out of place.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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