halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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