i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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