so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
