She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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