Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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