I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Randomize