i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
