Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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