I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
You can't special order awesome
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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