Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
