I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
