I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
