I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Slut skills are useful in every country.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
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It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
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We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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