yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
