make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
