I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
