yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
