why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
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