it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
