this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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