i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
she peed on how many people?
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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