this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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