last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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