You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
