there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize