I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Randomize
