So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
People with herpes should wear stickers.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize