I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
