but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
