Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
