My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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