WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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