Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
