No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
