I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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