I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
