no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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