You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
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