I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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