i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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