I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I FOUND THE LEGS
It's shark week go big or go home
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Randomize
