Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
